It's unusual advice but attendees at the Young Beef Producers Forum were told they needed to help the older generation feel safe, if succession plans were going to work.
'Taking the Reins' was the theme of the two-day networking event at Roma, and pull at the conscience of the 250 listening is what David Paton did, along with Ardie and Casey Lord.
Mr Paton, the AAM Investment Group's director of managed investments said he wanted to start hearing conversations about why succession succeeded rather than the norm now, of succession failures.
"It's one of the biggest challenges ag is facing," he said. "We've got to have an open dialogue about succession, and career progression, or you might look for something else to do."
One of the first issues he identified was unreal expectations about the time it takes to work through succession, as well as not knowing where to start, whether it be conversations with siblings or with parents, or both.
The need for patience was one of the top tips in Mr Paton's succession toolbox.
"Think of your worst expectation, multiply it by five and double it," he said. "You can be going at it decades later - realise that or get frustrated or resentful."
He then fired off the need for young people to have empathy.
"There's an intrinsic link between rural property and identity," he said. "Stakeholders will feel their identity is changing - you need to understand that, or there'll be an unsuccessful outcome."
Richmond cattleman Ardie Lord had a similar message when he and wife Kasie took to the stage 24 hours later.
Asked what the one piece of advice was they'd give to young people, Mr Lord said they should make the older generation feel safe, or they'd lock up.
He said he'd often heard the comment from young people that their father didn't know what to do next with his life.
"It might be his problem but it's also yours," he said.
Ms Lord chimed in to advise attendees to concentrate on learning who they were, so they could then listen with empathy.
The art of listening was high on her 'must have' list, saying that communication was not at the top of the list for rural people.
"How many people ask their daughter-in-law, are you happy, or their son, are you satisfied with your choice, and then listen to what they say with an open heart," she said.
"We don't ask because we don't want to hear the answer."
Ms Lord also said conversations must be with people, not about them.
"Stay until there's some sort of resolution," she said.
Continuing the theme of sticking at it, Mr Paton urged the forum's participants to be brave.
"if you don't take opportunities, no-one will know what you're thinking," he said, urging people not to have discussions on online platforms but rather face-to-face, and not to assume anything but to go into discussions with an open mind.
One toolbox tip that stuck with many was that fairness didn't equate to even.
"It can look inequitable on paper but be the fairest outcome," he said.
Mr Lord started out in the grazing industry at the height of the 1970s beef depression and said that over the next 10 years he was reaching up to touch bottom.
"The '80s taught us resilience, but every decade has its challenges," he said.
After 12 acquisitions in 40 years, he told the group that one of his main learnings was that they could be in partnership in business but assets should be held in one's own name.
He also urged the young people listening to take risks, saying the agricultural industry was a young person's game.
Asked what advice he had for people starting with nothing, he told them to start saving early.
"Save $10,000 and double it 15 times," he said. "Being a successful person in business has nothing to do with what you start with."
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